Cosmo dating advice for women
It’s sticky, wrecks the sheets, and, if done frequently, will give you Type II diabetes. Not being able to see means more spilling, which means more licking up the mess." This is proof positive that no one ever tries these things. “Dab some peppermint oil on your neck and between your breasts. Use "your electric toothbrush" or "your i Phone [when your vibrator is out of batteries]." To which I’ll just say, have you ever tried to lie to the Genius at the Apple Store who’s fixing your phone? If they hear any screams, they'll assume it's the movie." This will also create a relaxed ambiance. [On film selection] "Avoid anything that'll cause hearty belly laughs, like — a jiggly tummy won't make you feel good." That just makes me sad. "When he's least expecting it, tell your man you need some change.Here, it’s made more grotesque than usual by context: on the previous page, they advocate turning off the AC because a made-up-sounding chemical in your sweat boosts arousal. "Keep a spray bottle filled with ice water next to the bed, and give each other a strategic spritz to extend the encounter… "Use silicone-based lube to give each other pre-nooky rubdowns." Bonus: it’s water-resistant, so it’ll never come off! "Mix one tablespoon of saliva (the kind deep in your throat works best — its viscosity makes it a good substitute for lube) with one tablespoon of water to stretch the spit." They don't really explain if you're supposed to whisk it together in a bowl in the kitchen, or if you should just hock a loogie onto his pre-moistened junk, but I trust your judgment. Studies found that the smell of mint has a revitalizing effect. The smell of cinnamon buns increases men's blood flow 'down there.'" Good hard science from 's resident M. Then stick your hand in his pocket and touch his penis through the fabric, pretending that you're really digging around for that coinage you need.
Or try the windshield-wiper move; glide your thumb from side to side along the rim where his head begins, then move your thumb up and over the top of the head several times." If, at any point during this oddly elaborate ritual, he looks confused, toss him a heated stare and say, "I crave you" — you know, to clear things up. "34 percent of guys say they wish a girl would surprise them with oral when they walk in the door." The other two-thirds might think it's alarmingly precalculated, but that's a risk worth taking. "Fifty-six percent of unmarried men prefer receiving head while lying down as opposed to standing up, while the numbers are exactly reversed for married men." I think that means you are one married man and two standard deviations from overthinking foreplay. If these don't skyrocket your pleasure (and have him drowning in drool), we don't know what will." I pride myself on keeping up with the international register of erotic terminology, but somehow "drowning in drool" slipped right by me. "Tickle his feet with your nipples: climb on top of him in reverse cowgirl position, then bend over until your nipples reach the tops of his feet. (how rude of your vadge to have hogged it all these years)." Your vadge is a hog, women. And what sort of weirdly dexterous breasts allow for painting?However, after Googling it, I did learn that it accounts for 23% of nocturnal deaths among St. …Yowzah." When this sounds spicy, you have hit new heights of erotic boredom. Doesn't this just involve lunging at him like a brightly-colored walrus? "Draw an attention-grabbing circle around your nipples using rhinestones and body glue for a special night in." Definitely wait for a special night. "Cook dinner topless, apply a little tomato sauce to your nipple," and ask your man to lick it off." Just don’t attempt #16 and #17 on the same night — your man might choke on a rhinestone.